is weight loss good during pregnancy

We moved to South Carolina at the end of August for my husband to go through the pipeline (again). The first class up date for power school, October, my hubby did not get picked up. This week they put out the list of who will be classing up this time and my husbands name was on the list.

This morning when he came home and told me he was classing up, I was very surprised by my disappointment. Weve never been "on hold" like we have been here. He has had to muster twice a week while on hold, but he was home before 8 am every morning. By the time I got out of bed, he had already fed the boys breakfast and was cleaning up the kitchen, even on muster days. That was a definite bonus. By mid-November, I think we started grating on each other though. I really wanted him to class up soon. I told my mom, "If he doesnt class up this time, we are going to kill each other!" We dont have a busy calendar here and so we were all spending a lot of time at home together-- all.day.long. Wonderful for a month or so, but it is now December and we have been doing this since he graduated college in August (granted we did move from North Carolina to South Carolina during that time and he completed indoc, but, still, mostly just spent here at home). It is amazing how irritating little things can become when you spend all day, every day with someone.

Then we went on mini-vacation during Thanksgiving weekend. We spent four days at the beach with no plans, just hanging out as a family, away from our house and the day to day routine. We had so much fun. It was so refreshing coming home after that. And we talked about things we could do if he didnt class up this time... And I started thinking, "Oh, it would be nice if we could do this and that..."

So this morning I realized how much things will change around here. He fed the boys, as usual, this morning. While I got ready, he got the boys ready. While I was out of the house with the boys, he cleaned up the house and did the dishes. It really struck me just how much of a help he has been around here and how petty and silly the little things are. He would get irritated with me taking so long to get ready-- reading and talking on the phone to my sister while getting ready. I would get irritated with him for filling up the hamper after making a trip into his closet or not having the boys clean up their messes as they went. Today, that stuff all seemed silly. He gladly played with the boys while I chatted with my sister this morning, telling me to enjoy my last couple leisurely mornings. (Can I even emphasize how nice it is to have two parents home in the morning???) And when we got home, I noticed all the stuff he did do instead of all the stuff he didnt do and how much I appreciate him doing those things.

As for my feelings now that it has sunk in that hes classing up, Im fine with it. We came here for him to go through the pipeline and now hes started. Im surprised at how stressful it was to find out when he was classing up. For the October class he was told yes and no all the way up to the day school started. The next classes will probably be more of a roller coaster, SOBC and prototype. SOBC is unaccompanied in Connecticut. Prototype is either here or in upstate New York. I think Ill have a Navy wife heart attack if they tell him, "Oh yeah, you are classing up next week for prototype... in upstate New York." But I wont will do my best not to stress out about that until power school is over.

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fat weight loss during pregnancy

As luck would have it, the Navy brought an old friend back into our lives! I love that aspect on military life, the possibility of being stationed with friends again! Our neighbor from Hawaii just moved to South Carolina and now lives basically down the road from us. The last time I saw her, my oldest was about the age of her little 1-year old son. Now I have a 5-year old and 2-year old twins. She has a sweet, bubbly 1-year old who was content snacking on Plum Organic Puffs in a high chair while her and I caught up. As you can imagine, my boys were less than agreeable.

2 and a half is just a straight up hard to manage age. It is difficult to deal with when you have one child. It is even more difficult with two 2 and a half year olds. Even more difficult than that? When you also have an older sibling in the mix. The toddlers want everything their older brother touches. They take his toys, they try to climb in the chair hes sitting on. If hes playing on the floor, they want to climb on his back, wrestle with him. If hes outside, they want to go outside with him. And, of course, he can always get an argument going. They will be sitting at the table and hell walk over and say, "No." Out of the blue. No context. Nothing to do with what they are doing. Just, "No." Immediately their panties get in a knot, "Yes!" they scream. He counters, "No." And so a heated debate ensues, "Yes!" "No." "Yes!" "No." "Yesyesyesyesyesyes!" "Nononononono!"

To quote the Grinch, "Oh, the NOISE NOISE NOISE NOISE!"

I feel like the boys were so badly behaved during that whole playdate. Im definitely not saying that normally they are extremely well behaved, but things that normally arent such an issue were really difficult. Like, for some reason, our 5-year old started throwing his napkin in the air while sitting at the table eating lunch. He has literally never done that before. I was sitting with my girlfriend in the playroom, chatting, and we heard the loudest clanging coming from the family room. One of the toddlers had filled a bucket with blocks and dumped it upside down all over the floor. There were toys strewn everywhere. The toddlers screeched, "Noooo," when I told them to do something (honestly, so did our 5-year old). Our toddlers normally get tired and grouchy around 1 or 2, signaling naptime. They were behaving like they needed a nap at 12:30 pm! Omigosh, I think I apologized for interrupting our conversation to mediate arguing, screaming children like 10 times. When my husband came home that evening, I told him that it was just embarrassing.

My girlfriend, of course, was super sweet and didnt seem phased at all by our boys behavior. It is times like that that I wish I had a video of how things "normally" are around here, just so I can say, "It really isnt normally like this." Yes, things are normally busy. We normally have some degree of brotherly disagreements. We normally have a couple accidents, someone fell or something broke. We normally end up slightly off schedule or slightly late. We normally eat dinner a smidgen later than I wanted to. The toddlers are normally unpredictable at meal times-- will they eat today? Our 5-year old is normally extremely curious-- which has led to experiments gone awry. But normally it is just the right amount of chaos to keep each day exciting, keep me on my toes, keep things fun. Normally I dont need a referee whistle.

As a mom, it can be hard when your kids dont behave. In this instance, I really wanted them to put their best foot forward. I think I feel most self conscious of their behavior when hanging out with a mom who has younger kids than ours, when they havent "been there" yet. Now that our oldest is 5, some of the behaviors that I disagreed with in older children when he was an infant, I have found are just 5-year old behaviors. Some things I felt we would be strict on, we arent. Some things I thought we would be relaxed about, we arent. Some things I felt were signs of bad parenting, I dont anymore. Some things I felt were signs of good parenting, I dont anymore. It still can be hard when our kids arent being the sweet boys I know they can be, when they dont show the charming sides of themselves that we see. When the only glimpse given to a new (or new to them) friend isnt the glimpse I would have chosen.

This is why Im grateful for the friends in our life. Yeah, my girlfriend was probably a little overwhelmed yesterday. A 1-year old is seriously adorable, especially her sweet little boy. But she was understanding and actually wants to meet up with us again soon! :) Im not just grateful for our non-judgmental mommy friends. I mean all our good friends, our married friends without kids who truly enjoy hanging out with us and who always are exceedingly sweet to our boys (seriously, who wouldnt love people that not only say they love our boys, but who also play with them while I clean up dinner? Yeah. Fabulous). Our adult friends-- single, dating, engaged-- that find our busy family fun. My girlfriends that chat with our kids on the phone, that have special treats for them when we come to visit, that are available when we come to town for a girls night out (I love when my girlfriends love my kids and I love when my girlfriends take me out without my kids! Lol!). I love our friends who also have big families, like the friends I made in North Carolina with kids spaced like ours, twins and a singleton, or families with kids similar ages as ours, like a new friend made here in South Carolina. It is nice to be able to tell someone that the kids went nuts when company came over and they truly relate. Haha! :)

 

And, of course, friends like the gal I met up with yesterday who have littler kids than ours, who are accepting of our boys-- the good, the bad, and the downright toddler tantrums. I know from first hand experience how it feels to hold your sweet, well-behaved infant and watch a toddler have an epic meltdown over, say, a napkin. I know how it feels to think, "I will handle that much differently." I know how it feels to be absolutely surprised when my adorable toddler is face down and red-faced when company comes over or snatching toys at a playdate (or worse, snatching toys and then hitting his friends with those toys). I think that is part of the reason why I feel so self-conscious of the boys behavior in those situations, because I was that gal with the little guy before and I know what I thought on many occasions.

It really has been a humbling experience for me being on the other side of this scenario, the one with more kids, older kids. I hope that I can be the friend to these gals that my friends with more and older kids were to me back then.

What do you do when your kids misbehave?

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